The well sought after kiss . . . The kiss that says it all. Well for me, that kiss is still inside my head, or maybe I’m just not an easy swoon when it comes to romancing someone. When it comes to a romantic kiss, I can be far too practical and analytically inclined, you know, thinking about teeth n’ gums, tongue n’ breath—not mine—theirs. (Actually, I’m much harder on myself.)
Unlucky for me, you might think I shouldn’t be the one writing about a kiss. Luckily for me, you’ll be glad I did. I won’t be talking about the dynamics of an actual kiss, more like, a few holistic, hygienic hints to help emote the falsetto of love, and have you (or somebody) crooning, “Kiss me, again!” Yeah, just like ‘Stoney and Meatloaf’. (Never heard of them? No shame here. Early 70’s, I was really into their music.)
A romantic kiss gets pretty involved . . . the hands, the face, the lips, the mouth, the nose, the ears, the hair—(breathe) and let’s not forget our hearts. There’s a whole lot of touch, taste, and smell going on, and smells play an important role in attraction. There’s no magical scent, it’s more about the personal effluence of our immune systems that take hold, whether we realize it or not.
Now, this goes well beyond aromatic smells, the colognes and perfumes we dot, splash and sometimes douse on to entice and attract one another. The foods we eat, our dietary habits, have a bearing on the all-contained, scent-communication compounds in our bodies like breath, saliva, sweat, urine, skin oils, and sexual secretions. For example, if you eat a lot of garlic you’ll create a strong odor, and if you eat a lot of pineapple . . . well uh, yeah, it can be nice. But beyond that, an overcoat of bad hygiene can be an offensive turn-off for anyone. There’s just no cover-up for bad hygiene.
In the heat of canoodling, there’s definitely no time for compromising thoughts and pauses of hesitation on anyone’s part, especially when you’re face-to-face and in the act of parting lips. That’s just not the time to wonder if you’ve got everything together in the touch, taste and smell department. Of course, I am sure we have all (at some time or another) been on the receiving or giving end of a seedy and questionable kiss. (Stop. Some memories don’t need to be re-visited.) Let’s just do an imaginary walk-through . . .
You’re in his arms and your eyes are locked, shut.
He draws you in. I mean, who stops to think if there’s sleep or crust clinging to a corner of their eyes? Or, in this age of doe-eye’d, giraffe-sized, lash-on’s, the glue many women use to make them stick can get pretty nasty, clumpy, and an ooze out of place. Whether it’s the case of a little sleep in your eye, a bacterial infection, or poor glue applique, these things are best to be cleared-up.
Many years ago, I had an eyelash duct that was blocked and it ballooned with milky fluid at the most random of times. It was a long-term problem for me. It was kind of in the realm of blepharitus (an infection of the eyelid) eye-mites, and styes. The flareups were unnerving. One day, I came upon an old Hebrew woman in passing who told me how to get rid of it. Sounded crazy, but it worked. My urine was the cure. A cotton swab of my own urine, a dab or two day on the infected area, that’s what she told me to do. And however gross it might sound, that’s what I did. A few weeks later, voila!
But, hold tight. Just sharing an experience, here. There are other natural therapies for eye discharge to promote. I’ll send you right to a great source. https://www.stylecraze.com/articles/effective-home-remedies-to-treat-eye-infection/#EssentialOils. Now, let us carry-on.
Your noses brush . . . He breathes out . . . You breathe in.
The smell of the breath. The smell of the hands. The smell of the skin. The ancient practice of people rubbing noses is not as far-fetched and out-dated as it may seem. Mutual sniffing is an important part of attraction. It’s the next step in determining if the prospect you’re wrapped up in will be a sure mate.
Remember, every women is her own soil. No two women smell alike. To help the process along, for warm and comforting smells; coconut, vanilla, cinnamon and apricot . . . for cool and fresh smells; orange, lemon, lavender and eucalyptus. Underneath it all, clean and exfoliated skin is the key. Find a cleansing system that works best for you to get the clean you need and deserve. Practice it daily.
My regimen is pretty simple. A switch up of lavender and apricot soap is my clean-all, and olive is my go-to oil for a face and body moisturizer. I use a tea tree oil scrub (and mask) for deep cleaning and a hot cake of almond milk and oats for softening and exfoliating.
His lips gently press . . .
Soft pillowy lips, plump like a fig . . . Our lips don’t have oil or sweat glands, so they are terribly sensitive. Trust a green tea bag that’s been seeped in hot water to get rid of painfully, chapped lips. (Great for getting rid of raccoon eyes, too!)
Saliva and toothpaste dry lips out. So don’t lick your lips, too often. Protect them with beeswax, or petroleum jelly. I love rubbing mine with a vapor rub (that’s just me). And, don’t cut the corners. A baby oil wet wipe is a good dig in for those corner creases where miniature crumbs and those oooey, gooey, sticky, white-pockets (I don’t know–what is that?) can gather.
His tongue slips in . . . (Wait a minute!)
The mouth is a rabbit’s hole remnant of a kiss-monger’s habits. There’s always chance of something lingering inside of an open mouth. Nose drips, tooth aches, bleeding gums, food-blocked crevices, open cavities, cheek-sores, pus pockets, last night’s dinner and not to mention the tongue—a tongue can be layered with (days, weeks, even months) of festering’s. Imagine a slab of steak left out on an open counter to decompose. Simply put, disease prevention begins in the mouth. You never know if something deeper is lurking. (It’s not always just the onions and garlic.) Of course, if you’re one of those romantics who is not deterred by blood or vomit, well then, kiss on. Don’t let a dose of my realism ruin you.
Let me just reiterate, disease prevention begins in the mouth. And the strongest natural weapon for just about any infection that ails the mouth can be found in tumeric and coconut oil. This combination is simple, powerful and true. You can make your own natural tooth paste by mixing together ground/powdered tumeric and coconut oil. It stains your clothes (and fingernails) but not your teeth! It’s actually a great natural whitener for your smile. It stops inflammation, kills bacteria, curbs gum disease, and even rids you of the pain, decay and stench of cavities—it just doesn’t fill in the holes.
Scrub the paste into your teeth, tongue, gums, cheeks and on the roof of your mouth. Rinse thoroughly. And, for a real mouthwash powerhouse, take one part tea tree oil to about three parts water. Gargle, BUT DON’T SWALLOW! By all means, spit it out. Make this your habit for healthy gums and mouth. (Your dentist will be wowed, and maybe even a little disappointed that you will not require much extensive service.)
He sweeps his hands through your hair . . .
Things get rustled up a bit . . . The feel of his hands in your hair? Oily, cakey, a gel-freeze stiff encounter? Not exactly the classic clean of Prell. Not to mention, over usage of hair products can build-up and promote Stinky Scalp Syndrome. Stinky, what? (Yeah.) Heat styling, faking the funk with wigs, weave; all this, in a mix of heat, humidity and sweat, can really block hair follicles and stir up the stench, as well as stunt hair growth. And, if you’re enslaved to a hairstyle that cramps your freedom, you are prone to wash your hair less due to the time, upkeep and affordability.
At best, every three days let a good splash of water and your favorite shampoo/conditioner, lather/soak in your hair. Massage your scalp to avoid the head-slapping (and finger-scratching) excess of sebum blues. If you just can’t afford the time or cost to wet your hair often, a rub of watered-down tea tree oil, or witch hazel through the scalp with a cotton ball can aid in keeping things smelling fresh. ‘Do you,’ but be clean about it. And then, there’s always hair deodorant.
He playfully toys with and caresses your ear.
Okay. Time for a little anecdote.
This takes me way back to a latter day when one of my old friends from high school got the chance of a lifetime to kiss the boy she had been pawning for. He actualized her dreams with a kiss during an open-field of opportunity. How long she had dreamed about this moment! Of course, I was all ears to hear of her bell tolling experience—
“He had EEO–” she remarked.
“Yeah,” she laughed.
“What’s EEO?” I asked.
“Embarrassing Ear Odor!” And then, she went through the diagnosis protocol. (Run your finger up and all the way around the inner, backside crease of your ear and then, smell it.)
“Ohhhh?! Ewwww! I get it . . . and I’ve got it, too!” (For the very last time in my life, mind you.)
I never forgot that moment, or lesson. Seriously, scrub behind the ears. A dash of perfume or cologne behind the ears to cover up the pungency can actually make things worse. It’s best to always carry some wet-wipes when in question and swiffer inside and all around the ear, when in doubt. While you’re at it, swipe the back of the neck, too. Women who wear hairstyles that require them to avoid water and rain (at all costs) have a tendency to get the back of the neck and ears caught-up in the madness, causing those areas to sometimes miss out on a daily splash of cleanliness. Not good.
He pulls away, tracing his cupped hand along the smooth line of your chin. (Awww, just like in the movies.)
Will this be a ‘Kiss Me Again’ moment? Only you know. I dare say, if you keep these sanitary tips in mind and in practice, you won’t be blaming anything on hygiene—yours, that is–wouldn’t know about his.
Kissing promotes bonding’s of sexual pleasure and maternal care. For many women, kissing is a sign of loyalty. For many guys, a romantic kiss is just a prelude to sex. One thing for sure, a kiss is a natural lie detector. You can fake a lot of things in life, but you can’t fake a romantic kiss. A romantic kiss is the most liable expression of love there is.
What about sex, you ask? For some, sex is just sex. But, there is . . . Sacred Sex, which we will explore in an upcoming post on ‘BEYOND THE SUN’. (Muah!)